I found her article interesting for two reasons:

1. As a Mormon with many Mormon friends, I am subscribed to a couple dozen Mormon Mommy blogs on Google Reader to keep up with the lives of my family and friends. As a consequence, under Google Reader’s “Recommended items” tab, I get referred to a handful more of these Mormon Mommy blogs every day: pictures of perfect strangers, children I have never met, stories of their MLK day outings, etc. Google thinks I’m looking for more like these, but I’m actually not interested in strangers’ personal lives, and I don’t typically see anything particularly magical in them.
2. Ms. Matchar sees something uniquely appealing in these online scrapbooks. Something otherworldly. As she says, “Enter the Mormon bloggers, with their picture-perfect catalog lives. It is possible to be happy, they seem to whisper. We love our homes. We love our husbands.” It’s an angle on traditional womanhood that it seems was never examined in her years of modernist training.

I hadn’t considered her point of view until I read her article. You see, for me, these blogs represent reality. This is more or less home life as I lived it. I had a mom who stayed home to raise her kids. There were creative hand-sewn Halloween costumes, homemade quilts, sit-down breakfasts and dinners, and brown paper lunch sacks adorned with cleverly-coded nicknames for each of us 6 kids.

I had never really thought about a life that didn’t include some aspects of gardening, potty training, or cooking. Even as a man I have always planned on getting involved to some degree in domesticity as a husband and father. For me, the home life is the whole point!

I can certainly understand the predicament career women are in. Many of them need jobs, and they should be paid equally for equal work. A career is a laudable achievement for anyone and I’m pleased with how far our society has come in breaking such barriers. I would just caution anyone who carries the mindset that careers are the secret to ultimate joy and that men have selfishly reserved them for themselves through the centuries. I recently earned a masters degree and started my own career in earnest and…

…it’s not all that glamorous or exciting. It’s a good job; it suits me, and I’m certainly happy to have the income, the security and the professional challenge, but I don’t think I would be fulfilled if I made that the attribute that defined me. My job is really more of a means to my true end: a happy, healthy family life. And I believe it’s that attitude; that priority, so common in Mormonism, which fascinates Ms. Matchar.

Longish answer:  Funny you should ask.  Historically there has been some widespread speculation about that, particularly with respect to Mary Magdalene.  Thanks in part to The DaVinci Code, the issue has become more a part of popular culture in recent years.  It’s a fascinating debate, filled with all kinds of gnostic gospels and symbolism and things.

The LDS Church has no official statement about the subject (despite some speculation by early Church leaders in the affirmative).  The Bible doesn’t say He was, the Book of Mormon doesn’t say He was, and neither does the book of Doctrine and Covenants.  But—and I’m hoping I speak for the majority here—I wouldn’t be at all surprised to find out He is, especially considering that we believe marriage and family to be a central and necessary aspect of full happiness in the eternities.  So, (purely my own opinion) I personally think He probably is, but I don’t think anyone now living knows for sure.

Incidentally, one of my favorite things about believing in continuing revelation and modern day prophets is that I have a good deal of hope that questions like these will be answered in the future through a prophet.  We don’t have to claim to know everything about everything now because the gospel is living and being clarified and added to all the time. It’s a luxury that’s somewhat unique to being LDS, and I like it.

Well, the Church’s position is that women are very capable leaders. The women’s organization (Relief Society) is led by 4 women (president, 1st counselor, 2nd counselor, secretary) with the same organization in the Primary (children’s classes). Women also lead the teenage girls (Young Women Organization) in the same fashion. Women give sermons for the whole church, and they teach Sunday school lessons. However, the main body of the congregation (called a ward, or a branch) is led by men.

As far as women being priests, pastors, or whatevers, that just isn’t women’s job. Okay, that sounds sexist, but it isn’t, just hear me out (and know that I am a woman).

See, God isn’t running a democracy and He doesn’t have to give His power to everyone to be fair. He is running a theocracy; and it works well because He knows everything, understands what we need, and is completely Good.

So He has assigned the worthy men the role of carrying his authority to preside over the church, give Priesthood blessings, and serve as God himself would serve. This is really good for men, in general. It gives them the opportunity and responsibility to take care of others, serve, and become selfless. Men sometimes have a hard time looking outside themselves, and with this responsibility solely on their shoulders, they are solely responsible to God for how they do. If they don’t do what they are supposed to bad things can happen. That’s how apostasy comes about.

He gave women an equally responsible job–they are in charge of raising their children to be God-loving, respectful, and well-balanced. This is a huge job: like the Priesthood, they are accountable to God for how they do; and, like the priesthood, the responsibility helps them take care of others, serve, and become selfless. If they don’t follow through with their duties, and their children grow up without knowing God, or keeping His commandments, bad things can happen. That’s why the earth was flooded.

Women are endowed with the capacity to love, nurture, protect, feel, serve, obey, beautify, and charm. It is in our mitochondria from all the way back to Eve. Men are ordained and set apart to hold the priesthood. This calling and ordination gives them the power to serve, protect, lift, discern, organize, preach, prophesy, bless and heal. Both callings make us humble. Both callings cause us to be selfless. Both callings allow Christ to build his kingdom on the earth through his servants. A division of labors is absolutely necessary in order to build the kingdom within the lives of each member from childhood on (women) and to organize it locally and globally (men).

Heavenly Father has designed the work of women and men to complement each other and to build on each other. It is as though women are in charge of making sure that each building block is strong, whole and dependable, and the men are in charge of overseeing the organization of those blocks into a church and a kingdom. Neither one would get very far without the other, and when men and women work together to build the kingdom in such a way, they succeed.

Women are just as important as men, and men are just as important as women. We are equal in the sight of God, though our roles on earth differ. “[We must be] ready and prepared to function as a full partner in a celestial team–without having to look up because of any feeling of inferiority, or look down because of any feeling of superiority, but look across into the eyes of an equally prepared, equally magnificent eternal mate.” (Ida Smith. “The Lord as a Role Model for Men and Women.” Ensign, August 1980, 4.)

Some sections of society look upon LDS women with pity – they want to come and free us from our “brain-washed bondage.” Not only do I not need any intervention from “those who know better”, I don’t want it.

This is a church that celebrates women. It follows the example of Christ in loving, respecting and honoring women. Jesus first appeared to Mary, after His resurrection; his last instructions on the cross were for the well-being of his mother; He taught women as much as He taught men. His gospel is good news to EVERYONE – men, women and children, from all over the world, and His church plays no favorites. Women are just as much welcome to His love and salvation as men are, and that is one reason why I feel liberated as an LDS woman.

Another reason is that I am allowed and expected to be a woman; to do things that women enjoy doing. Deep down in the hearts of most women, they want to be home, with their children, nurturing and teaching them how to be contributing members of society. Financial obligations and social pressures make this very difficult for the majority of women in the world–but living an ole’ fashioned family life is something that LDS women are encouraged to do. Does this make us slaves in the kitchen? No. It just allows us to become unfettered by the social chains that demand that we “contribute” to society (all the while letting other people raise our children without any investment in their well-being). I’ve worked in an office. I’ve taught school. I’ve planned conferences and made travel arrangements and handled logistics and gone to fancy dinners (that I had to plan) and it does not even compare to being a mother. There is nothing as rewarding as loving and caring for a baby (or two) every day. Sure, I don’t sleep as much as I’d like, and I just got peed on while in the process of writing this blog. My shirt is often covered with baby-fluids, and my life has revolved around a 3-hour schedule for the last year, but I am so happy. I don’t dread anything in my day–no presentations, no ornery co-workers, no long boring meetings, no disrespectful teenagers and no tech malfunctions that put everything on hold. I find so much satisfaction in watching my son learn to walk and talk (and growl, thanks to his Dad), pick up food and feed himself, notice things around him and get excited about his toys. It can’t be explained, but it is wonderful. Trust me.

Not all LDS women stay home with kids, of course, and that is fine too. Many women work and enjoy it, and they are in total compliance with the church as well. Liberating, isn’t it? We can choose what we want to do, but we are encouraged to do what we have been pre-programmed to enjoy. Families are strong, marriages are strong, people are happy–all doing exactly what God put us here to do.

Those who demand that women have a career may think that the only way to have equal respect is to have identical roles. This approach is like putting a thick and juicy steak and a flaky, delicious fresh peach pie in a blender so that one flavor will not dominate over the other – A well-cooked steak is just as satisfying as a well-prepared pie! (From the perspective of one who would prefer a pie to a steak). Grinding up steak and pie together would ruin the meal — the texture would be lost, the flavor combinations, the distinct tastes. These attributes make them unique, but they do not make one superior over the other. Likewise, putting men and women in a societal blender would not only not work, it would ruin the balance that we need.

Liberating.